It has been quite awhile since I wrote something for this site. Honestly, when you love to write, it makes you feel incomplete to see months of blank entries (I swear).
You know what? I am just typing everything out here, all that I can think of (so I apologize for the free writing). Sometimes being too structured sucks. Yeah, so here it goes:
My soul: the foundation
This entity is probably one of the most important treasures I have in my life. The past few weeks, my soul has been ripped off, stepped on and thrown into the garbage. It is sad because I am unable to help my soul get rid of supposedly ‘unnecessary emotions’. Emotions, such a wonderful word but a traitor at the same time.
My main system: the hive
With all the commotion in my life, my brain has suffered probably around 40% of the total damage. This overthinking guy has worked on a pessimistic way which is so not him.
It came to a point that this guy questioned his purpose and existence, answering puzzles, connecting the dots and remembering all the details of people and scenarios. He has healed (which is the good thing about him, he moves on fast), he forgives but never forgets.
My cosmic totality: The camp
The physical body is just an earthly thing, the power of my mind and soul are still the strongest factors that keeps me alive.
Good and bad things happened, yeah, but when you know who you are, the word permanent is shredded to pieces.
Of course, to any human beings- I needed time to heal, I wanted to be like Naruto (who heals in nano seconds when damaged physically), but with the soul and heart, it takes time.
The present: to which we need to live
My eyes are back in seeing the good things around me. The beauty of everything around me (to be exact lol). My heart valued more the true people who stayed with me through thick and thin. This cutie adventure (HAHA) made my theory stronger about myself; I don’t really change, I learn and wake-up being a better version of myself when faced with issues in life. I will always live with a purpose in life ( I have 1 major and probably 2-3 other that’s branching out from the main one). This purpose keeps me going in life (Like a legit ninja).
The learning as I was riding the black horse across the deceiving kaleidoscope: the after effect
Put up walls– strengthen your heart, but not too much it will destroy you. A heartless (from the Kingdom Heart’s villain character) is not a good person to walk this earth. I think that’s the saddest version of your humanity.
Trust no one- I couldn’t be more proud of my small crowd of quality people, I can even count them using my fingers (on one hand). Gone are the days that everyone is a chummy. Although being the person that I am, I will be very normal and (be the Dior I am; happy, positive and loving) and all that. But my downside (which I admit as my weakness is), I don’t forget. But I forgive, that’s from the heart.
Oh to add to that line, to any category in life. Following the crowd or the majority is is plain stupidity ( I think I want to write a book about this HAHA).
Emotions- Feel it, I have mentioned this in my previous blogs but it pays to share it again and again (I swear).
I’ve always believed God has created all these emotions and words for you to feel and experience. Anger, sadness, joy, disgust and fear (made a roll call of all the Disney Pixar movie!), these emotions and ‘words’ are useless if we don’t get the essence of feeling them.
At the end of the day they help you know yourself better and it is a good life to know yourself, there’s just this unexplained feeling whenever I discover something new about me (like for real). Do you also get that adrenaline like some light just shines above you from an airship? I guess it’s the best explanation I can share about discovering yourself.
Yepyep, ending my blog but definitely will be back to share my thoughts again in the future!
Wait up, I want to include this inspiring song from one of my legendary fave singers (well not that she’s old) HAHA. I think this song is so appropriate for this entry. Enjoy bae Tori 🙂